Runboard.com
You're welcome.
The Neutral Zone
Welcome To The Neutral Zone:
The place to discuss topics that may cause debates on other boards without getting yelled at or banned!

"It is not so much our friends' help that helps us, as the confidence of their help." - Epicurus


runboard.com       Sign up (learn about it) Sign in (lost password?)


Page:  1  2  3 ... 10  11  12  13 

 
Petal Alderin Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Resident Rusharound
(Top of the page)

Registered: 01-2008
Posts: 968
Karma: 19 (+22/-3)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


I'm interested in the viewing Queeny because we don't do that here, but it seems to be the norm in America from what I've heard.
If you don't mind, I'd like to know more about it? I wonder about the reason for it all ... maybe for loved ones to get closure, as they say, by actually viewing the body of their loved one?

---
Anything Goes
9/17/2009, 2:31 pm Link to this post Send e-mail to   Send PM to Blog
 
Morwen Oronor Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Resident Scholar
(Top of the page)

Registered: 01-2008
Location: South Africa
Posts: 1743
Karma: 15 (+28/-13)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


If it means anything at all Queeny, in my eyes, you're a good person.
And my comment about moving things around was not a silliness. I know a lot of people who believe that dead people can communicate with the people they used to care about when they were alive and that's what it was all about. If I'm at all able to prove that there's life after death, believe me I will do everything I can to clear that one up for the people who are still alive when I croak.
In the meantime I'm going to live what's left of this life to the absolute fullest.
I have to tell some of my own experience while on this subject. While we were away, my husband's sisters and brother looked after our house. It was an opportunity for less fortunate family members to have a free vacation and at the same time to ensure that none of the affirmative shoppers in the area decided to take advantage of a free shopping opportunity (i.e. break into the house).
Two of his sisters have been committed members of a very religious Christian group for over 30 years and in all the time I've known them, I've never had a chance to really get to know them because of our philosophical differences which we don't discuss because we don't want to cause fights within the family.
I was astounded by the ignorance of these women about ordinary everyday things and about how backward their thinking was about running a house and about making food.
You'd think that they would at least make an effort to stay up to date with some aspects of the things that their own families know, but not at all.
For instance, when I explained why we don't eat processed foods, they looked all surprised that I know about that sort of thing and that I'm prepared to debate politics and so on with the husband. In their view women don't do that. They don't argue about men eating junk, they just let it go and to make food tasty, they do what the husband says and use chemically processed sauces and so on. When I pointed out to the husband that he should eat steamed vegetables because they are good for them, the one sister made a big 'o' with her mouth, surprised that I was prepared to disagree with him.
They don't know anything, just go along with whatever the husband tells them to and spend hours making themselves pretty because 'he' likes to look at a well-turned-out woman. They were rattled that I walk around in big bulky t-shirts and that I don't care about whether my hair is done or my nails painted and my hands all smooth and ladylike.
I put all of this ignorance down to the fact that marriage at 20, made them into their husbands' vassals and they've never questioned any of it.
And the husbands, they simply don't do housework, they don't cook or wash dishes or hang laundry. They were amazed that my husband packs his own laundry away and packs his own travelling case. Surely that's women's work?
This is the sort of thing I hate about what deep religious belief does. It makes women into scared rabbits and men into bullies.
I'd far rather see an equal partnership where both people pull their weight in everything and where no one member has more or less power than the other.
9/18/2009, 1:12 am Link to this post Send PM to Blog
 
bummee Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Registered user
(Top of the page)

Registered: 08-2009
Posts: 184
Karma: 0 (+1/-1)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


At some of the funerals that I attended, most folks walk by and spend a moment looking at the departed one. Sometimes they will even reach out to touch the hand or face. Not something I would do! Even beyond my belief is to actually bend over to kiss the departed one.

When I see a friend or relative in his/her casket, my mind is telling me that this is not the person that I knew or loved. I see the dead body as only a shell or something like a wax replica of my friend or loved one.

And yet I know I will never see or actually hold a conversation again with this person.

There was only twice when I ever broke down to cry. Once was when my dog was killed by a truck. The second time that I cried was a good sixty years later after my good friend Charlie had died. And that was because it was only then that I began to be aware of how much this person loved a little boy with only one eye!

Bummy



9/18/2009, 11:21 am Link to this post Send e-mail to   Send PM to
 
Queenyforever Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Resident DroolQueen
(Top of the page)

Registered: 01-2007
Location: Walking a new path in Nature.
Posts: 866
Karma: 23 (+29/-6)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


Petal, the "Viewing" is basically a way to have a last "goodbye" surrounded by only the family and closest [sign in to see URL] yes, it is when those family members may come up and kiss the deceased or lay a little something special in the casket. There is a short, small service performed by their Priest, and lots of tears, hugging and holding....
The next day is the more proper funeral, for Jack that meant us following the hearse, and the limo (or in this case a Cadillac) carrying his Wife and 2 daughters, they were followed in order of age of the [sign in to see URL] the way back through his [sign in to see URL] had almost 50 cars, with a Police escort and headed off by 20 of his Marine buddies on [sign in to see URL] the very, very formal Military service at the cemetery. Because it is so formal, the casket is closed and covered in a flag that was flown over the United States Capital....
But that is what a "viewing" is....

---

✴ Birthplace: Earth ✴ Race: Human ✴ Politics: Freedom ✴ Religion: Love♥

9/18/2009, 1:23 pm Link to this post Send e-mail to   Send PM to Blog
 
Order ofMelchizedek Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Registered user
(Top of the page)

Registered: 07-2006
Location: Here I am
Posts: 504
Karma: -2 (+21/-23)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


quote:

If it means anything at all Queeny, in my eyes, you're a good person.


It doesn't happen often, but here it is again, we agree on something, Morwen! As little as I know you Queeny, I would consider you to be a "good person", but only from mankind's perspective. According to God's standard, you're just as wicked as the rest of us. emoticon
quote:

And my comment about moving things around was not a silliness.

Sure it was, you don't even believe it.
quote:

in all the time I've known them, I've never had a chance to really get to know them because of our philosophical differences which we don't discuss because we don't want to cause fights within the family.


That would seem to be the wise thing, judging from the views you've revealed in your posts.
quote:

I was astounded by the ignorance of these women about ordinary everyday things and about how backward their thinking was about running a house and about making food.


Oh, here we go! If that's the kind of thing you're going to say, then you were right to keep quiet.
quote:

For instance, when I explained why we don't eat processed foods, they looked all surprised that I know about that sort of thing


More likely, they were not awed by your wisdom, but just thought it was odd that you consider a trivial thing so imortant. But to each their own.
quote:

and that I'm prepared to debate politics and so on with the husband. In their view women don't do that.


Why not? Are they Amish or something?
quote:

When I pointed out to the husband that he should eat steamed vegetables because they are good for them, the one sister made a big 'o' with her mouth, surprised that I was prepared to disagree with him.

Maybe it wasn't your place to tell him what he should eat. Were you cramming your own personal beliefs down his throat?
quote:

They were rattled that I walk around in big bulky t-shirts and that I don't care about whether my hair is done or my nails painted and my hands all smooth and ladylike.


They might have just been frightened.
quote:

This is the sort of thing I hate about what deep religious belief does. It makes women into scared rabbits and men into bullies.


Yep, religion is a man-made thing, it is mis-used and abused and has absolutely nothing to do with Christianity.
quote:

I'd far rather see an equal partnership where both people pull their weight in everything and where no one member has more or less power than the other.


Ya know, I've once heard it said that a marriage should be 50/50. But I've heard a better one. It should be 100/100, no keeping score, just both partners giving 100 percent. I think that fits better.

---

Do you not know? Have you not heard? He gives strength to the weary. To those who hope in Him, they will soar like eagles. -RSJ

9/18/2009, 2:26 pm Link to this post Send PM to
 
Petal Alderin Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Resident Rusharound
(Top of the page)

Registered: 01-2008
Posts: 968
Karma: 19 (+22/-3)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


Thanks for the explanation ... I think it may bring comfort to some people to have a viewing then, although I think I would probably break down even more if I had to see the body of a loved one in a casket - I think I'd rather remember them in happier times. It's interesting to me because America is the only place I've heard of viewing, Queeny. As I said, I think it's seldom done here. I'm sure private viewings could be arranged for those close family members to whom it would be important but there wouldn't be any organized times arranged the day before the funeral, or anything like that.
Here family and friends usually gather at the church for the funeral service itself and then follow in a cortege to the cemetery for a burial, but these days memorial services seem to be the trend and cremation is becoming more the way of things. Then, the coffin is in the church sometimes, sometimes not, depending on the family's wishes. And if it is, after the service the undertakers simply remove the casket and nobody goes anywhere else except to have refreshments, usually at the church hall or otherwise at the home of one of the family members.
I've been to many, many military funerals and they always reduce me to a quivery blob, they are so so emotional and so moving. My Dad had a MOTH funeral and I managed to hold out pretty well I thought, until they snuffed the candle out at the end ....

---
Anything Goes
9/18/2009, 3:00 pm Link to this post Send e-mail to   Send PM to Blog
 
bummee Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Registered user
(Top of the page)

Registered: 08-2009
Posts: 184
Karma: 0 (+1/-1)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


A MOTH funeral?

I just got back from checking this one out!

With all due respect Petal, is this the normal way for people to say goodbye to their loved ones in your culture or the military?

It is just a term that I have not heard of.

Bummy

9/18/2009, 7:29 pm Link to this post Send e-mail to   Send PM to
 
Morwen Oronor Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Resident Scholar
(Top of the page)

Registered: 01-2008
Location: South Africa
Posts: 1743
Karma: 15 (+28/-13)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


I don't do funerals and everybody knows that. No one asks why they just accept that I don't go to them. I do go to wakes though!
9/19/2009, 1:55 am Link to this post Send PM to Blog
 
Petal Alderin Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Resident Rusharound
(Top of the page)

Registered: 01-2008
Posts: 968
Karma: 19 (+22/-3)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


My Dad was a member of this wonderful organization and was "Old Bill" of the Ammo Shellhole in Durban for as long as I was growing up.
It's an organization for ex-servicemen and anyone who is interested can read about it here:

]MOTH

The ex-servicemen from various sections of the military and other services who have seen action, participate in a very moving "march past" every year en route to the Cenotaphs in participating countries, on 11 November, wearing red poppies and all their medals, to remember their fallen comrades.

"At the going down of the sun, and in the morning, we will remember them".


---
Anything Goes
9/19/2009, 5:22 am Link to this post Send e-mail to   Send PM to Blog
 
bummee Profile
Live feed
Blog
Friends
Miscellaneous info

Registered user
(Top of the page)

Registered: 08-2009
Posts: 184
Karma: 0 (+1/-1)
Reply Quote
Re: The Good Person Test


Thank you Petal. I did a few minutes research on it and I was hoping my understanding would be confirmed. Again I thank you.

Bummy
9/19/2009, 7:43 am Link to this post Send e-mail to   Send PM to
 


Add a reply

Page:  1  2  3 ... 10  11  12  13 





You are not logged in (login)